Here is my post on the Chicago wrap up.
I chose “Pumpin Blood” by NONONO as the song we all bow to because I’ve been spinning to it so much and my heart has been at the forefront of my mind this year. On January 1st my heart started racing and I drove the the ER and ended up having a scarier situation then I thought. Very standard SVT it turns out but scary as hell. I’ve been working hard to unravel whatever it is that has wound me so tight the last few years.
My little attacks have calmed way down due to exercise, water, saying no, praying, reading, yoga, drinking with friends, not drinking at times, calling my therapist, more dinner with friends who make me laugh until I cry, prescribed drugs, whatever you name it, a lot. The one thing I’ve been trying so hard to do is to not let the anger consume me and not let my fear swallow me up.
Right before the show I started to become so scared to leave my kids.
But as I flew home and looked over the Rockys as we bounced a little I asked myself, how can I teach my children to be as fearless as they can possibly be? How can I teach them that?
I know I struggle, battle and sludge my way through eyeball high fear but at least I did it, I got on the plane (a fear of mine) and was deeply rewarded by the experience I had in Chicago.
Just as I typed that my friend, my catalyst really for Chicago just texted me saying she was proud of me. I’m so thankful that I have a friend who would say that. And I’m so happy this friend is pregnant! Took her 6 years of trying and as soon as I found out bam, Chicago was in the works.
Couldn’t have asked for a better week.
Thank you to all who participated. Here are the lyrics to “Pumpin Blood.”
Hey heart, on the road again, moving on, forward
See the stars, won’t break the bones
They’re in the car, on the highway
It’s so magical, feeling, that no one’s got a hold
Your heart can list the all, happiness you know
This is your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood
It’s your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood
And the whole wide world is whistling
Hey heart, on the road again, driving stand, forward
See the stars, won’t take his course
Got the band and …
It’s the best of world’s feeling, like nothing can go wrong
Hear the sirens, the world, you catching on
This is your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood
It’s your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood
And the whole wide world is whistling
Hey heart, won’t you run again
On the highway, on the highway
Hey heart, won’t you run again
On the highway, on the highway
This is your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood
It’s your heart, it’s alive
It’s pumping blood