There is always a a strange transition from going to staying up late, wearing red or sparkly lipstick, heels and hearing thunderous applause for something you’ve poured your soul into juxtaposed to the next early morning with your kids.
Greeted with hugs and hustling and thoughts swirling around your head the days tasks seem a bit harder for me sometimes.
I’ll never forget flying back from NYC after a week of putting the show on there in ’09 and quietly sitting with my 3 year-old at his little table and draping my cardigan around his shoulder and watching him eat.
I’m so grateful for being able to experiencing both but there is an Expressing Motherhood hangover.
Part of me wants more.
More nights off from putting the kids to bed, more nights to connect with other adults to feel connected to humanity.
I look forward to four more shows this weekend.
Every time the show ends I began to retreat and think about where to take the show next. Every time I tell myself don’t rush into the next one, enjoy your kids.
I do enjoy my kids.
I spend a lot of time with them.
I’m not sure where we’ll go next but I’m thinking by the end of Sunday night my intuition will scream at me to do this or that next.
It always helps the Expressing Motherhood hangover last not quite so long. Knowing I can pour myself back into it again. And for the performers, I’ve seen countless numbers of them jump into other projects. Solo shows, more writing, etc.
As I type in my go to mom outfit, yoga pants and tennis shoes, the only reminder of the show are my bright red and sparkly nails, the co-existion of both sides of me.